The family stood outside the storage shed – Mom and dad, two brothers and three sisters. Their eyes were on the fourth sister, who stood next to a large contraption which sat outside the shed’s doors.
The fourth daughter was upset. “I have the right to die in a dignified manner,” she told her family.
“Now Betsy,” Mom stepped forward, hands on her hips and a scowl on her face, “There is nothing dignified about throwing yourself into the wood chipper!”
“She’s right, you know,” one of the twin brothers (oldest by two minutes) added, “Your guts and blood and bones are gonna fly everywhere.”
“And I just did that laundry!” the youngest sister pointed to the clothesline which hung nearby, drying in the gentle breeze (because drying them on the line made them smell springtime fresh). It was in the direct line of fire of the wood chipper.
“Well it’s not fair!” Betsy stomped her foot, “Bobby was supposed to take me to the prom and now he’s taking that — that — whore!”
Pop covered his hands with his face, Mom gasped “Language!” and the other sisters giggled. The brothers rolled their eyes simultaneously.
“Is that all?” the youngest of the twins asked.
“Is that all? Is that all!” Betsy picked up a piece of wood and chucked it at him, “I don’t have a prom date! Everyone will laugh at me!”
“We’ll take care of that girl for you,” the oldest brother soothed, “then you’ll have your prom date back.”
“Sure,” his twin agreed with a grin, “Knock her in the head, take her out to Pike’s Point and throw her in the woods, they won’t find her for months. Prom will be over by then.”
“You would do that for me?” Betsy smiled for the first time since her date had dumped her, “Really?”
“Of course,” both brothers agreed, “Anything for our little sister!”
“You’re the best!” Betsy threw herself at her brothers, nearly knocking them over.
“Can we go inside now?” Pop shook his head and turned toward the house, “My dinner’s getting cold.”
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